tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post4144521603487506854..comments2023-10-17T09:46:20.456-04:00Comments on facebooking from the edge...: The one where I'm not thankfulAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-65401713366481440302012-11-30T10:59:11.582-05:002012-11-30T10:59:11.582-05:00Good on you for trying to eliminate vodka. I tried...Good on you for trying to eliminate vodka. I tried that once. Needless to say, I have an opened bottle right now. That White Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10841650746277749285noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-63936086663585635042012-11-27T20:06:44.702-05:002012-11-27T20:06:44.702-05:00Whenever I think of committing a crime AKA murder ...Whenever I think of committing a crime AKA murder (which is every day since my mother in law lives with us), I refer to an episode of season 1 of Beyond Scared Straight. In the episode, they went to a women's prison. <br /><br />I have been lead to believe that women's prison is a sexy kind of place... Mostly due to porn. But, it's not. Sometimes, there is a really mean woman there who runs everything. She calls herself Diabla and has a tattoo on her face of chains. These chains link into an ink beard. Her eyes are made of fire, and she is scarier than a parade of clowns.<br /><br />**Shiver**<br /><br />Hugs!<br /><br />ValerieValeriehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15463173488099670688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-74029617836837030042012-11-27T10:29:41.809-05:002012-11-27T10:29:41.809-05:00Yikes, flu and babysitting? Props to you for doing...Yikes, flu and babysitting? Props to you for doing it all sans vodka. I would have caved.Vesta Vaynehttp://cowardlyfeminist.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-35888239990242113092012-11-26T22:33:55.599-05:002012-11-26T22:33:55.599-05:00My ex was a correctional officer and shared with m...My ex was a correctional officer and shared with me some of the prison secrets for making hooch out of potatoes, orange juice, etc., and shivs out of paper plates.<br /><br />I could deal with that, but not peeing in front of strangers and other on lookers. That's a deal breaker. Sorry, Prison. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-39551515480793184722012-11-26T22:32:31.792-05:002012-11-26T22:32:31.792-05:00Oh wait... I thought you were in your early 20s. ...Oh wait... I thought you were in your early 20s. Never mind. You're older than my oldest kiddo.<br /><br />Whew...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-69989506083399435152012-11-26T22:19:00.955-05:002012-11-26T22:19:00.955-05:00The way you ease into whiskey is to start out with...The way you ease into whiskey is to start out with whiskey sours or whiskey Old Fashioned. The Old Fashioned is the best because you get to muddle a bunch of citrus and sweet shit in a glass and then add the whiskey (and a little club soda if you really want.) Though if you're going to go with the Old Fashioned, be classy and use Brandy. SOOOO good.Mandihttp://www.atypicallyrelevant.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-87277160743818505492012-11-26T22:14:23.109-05:002012-11-26T22:14:23.109-05:00I'm 32 in a few months... I thought I was stil...I'm 32 in a few months... I thought I was still a littler older than your oldest kiddo.Mandihttp://www.atypicallyrelevant.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-86980945075717844272012-11-26T21:00:02.890-05:002012-11-26T21:00:02.890-05:00I googled "prison made vodka" - there ar...I googled "prison made vodka" - there are some interesting things on the inside, but most likely things of substandard koala-ity.esbbostonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09946279220170973147noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-41283294126517533502012-11-26T15:53:40.972-05:002012-11-26T15:53:40.972-05:00Oops. Was I NOT supposed to share that with the b...Oops. Was I NOT supposed to share that with the blogosphere? My bad. ;)<br /><br />Embrace it, baby!! Not our fault that everyone else out there are just tots. Besides, I have plans. Oh yes, plans I say. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. <br /><br />(I need to know how you make those devil face emoticons. Please and thank you).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-87760210141517468912012-11-26T14:46:16.254-05:002012-11-26T14:46:16.254-05:00It's true. I've been gracing this planet ...It's true. I've been gracing this planet with my "ness" for half a freaking century.<br /><br />I'm pretty sure I have kids older than you.<br /><br />In fact, I know I do.<br /><br />God I'm old.<br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-46080281007846268932012-11-26T14:45:24.909-05:002012-11-26T14:45:24.909-05:00It really took it out of me. I think I need a dri...It really took it out of me. I think I need a drink.<br /><br />If I could only stand whiskey, I'd be all over a hot toddy. But the smell makes me want to hurl. Sad but true. <br /><br />If Prohibition comes back I will move to Ireland, where the beer flows like wine and the vodka flows like... um... vodka. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-9085138428548356812012-11-26T14:43:52.195-05:002012-11-26T14:43:52.195-05:00I'm pretty sure that Dorkin is in a class all ...I'm pretty sure that Dorkin is in a class all by himself... please tell me there aren't more of him. If there are, I weep for the future.<br /><br />And your slow claps always give me the warm fuzzies :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-83019704711462378872012-11-26T14:09:24.220-05:002012-11-26T14:09:24.220-05:00Wait, I just read Misty's comment. You're ...Wait, I just read Misty's comment. You're going to be FIFTY? No. I don't believe that you're old enough to be my mama.Mandihttp://www.atypicallyrelevant.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-28955390414210409212012-11-26T14:07:48.561-05:002012-11-26T14:07:48.561-05:00Number one, congrats on catching up the entire las...Number one, congrats on catching up the entire last week in one blog post. It was impressive and I have no hope of doing the same for the 2 and a half weeks I've missed at this point.<br /><br />Number two, for fuck's sake woman, just drink some god damn whiskey! You have the flu and if that doesn't call for a hot toddy, or some hot buttered rum, then we should just bring prohibition back.Mandihttp://www.atypicallyrelevant.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-51175074335471360022012-11-26T13:12:41.087-05:002012-11-26T13:12:41.087-05:00((s-l-o-w c-l-a-p)) After just walking out of a cl...((s-l-o-w c-l-a-p)) After just walking out of a classroom jam packed with functionally retarded undergrads I feel so much better that Dorkin is not alone. I love you, Girl; feel better, and remember that alcohol is used to kill germs, so. . .I'm just sayin'. ;)Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11099937803169146205noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-40031472637076865102012-11-26T12:36:19.083-05:002012-11-26T12:36:19.083-05:00Well fuck me hard.
I totally forgot about my birt...Well fuck me hard.<br /><br />I totally forgot about my birthday. TOTALLYFORGOTABOUTMYBIRTHDAY... MYMOTHERFUCKINGFIFTIETHBIRTHDAY.<br /><br />Amendment: There will be no vodka until the 20th.<br /><br />It is now re-written.<br /><br />You're a lifesaver, dollface.<br /><br />And yeah... Dorkin will one day receive a Darwin Award. Posthumously. I mean, is there really any other way?<br /><br />Love you longtime!!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223158968534558268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2300611070893992585.post-44358601743268414252012-11-26T12:24:56.357-05:002012-11-26T12:24:56.357-05:00Oh Dani. NO VODKA? Until Xmas Eve? Um, when you...Oh Dani. NO VODKA? Until Xmas Eve? Um, when you were doing these brilliant calculations, did you happen to realize that that means you will not be able to consume vodka on your birthday? Your FIFTIETH birthday? Ok, just checking.<br /><br />Dorkin is going to end up on that 100 Stupidest Ways to Die or some such, isn't he? I mean, he sounds destined for it. Not much you can do to stop it, Aunt Dani. Just let him go . . .<br /><br />And this plethora of word vomitting blog post more than made up for the sahara of blogging last week. In a good way! With love! ;)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com