Facebook Status(es) of the Week

I kind of have a love/hate relationship with Dog the Bounty Hunter.  I've only watched the show once, mainly because one of Dan's former coworkers, who wasn't the brightest bulb in the chandelier, said to me (and I quote, because I thought it was so freaking hilarious that I now say it ALL THE TIME whenever I see anything remotely related to Dog):  "Have you ever seen Dog the Bounty Hunter?  It's about a bounty hunter, named Dog?"

Dog fascinates me.  The clothes, the tan, the hair, the wife... Her clothes, her tan, her hair, her boobs... And there is always something familiar about Dog...

Then I saw this, and it all made sense:

(On a totally unrelated note, what is that shit hanging down the sides of his head???  It kind of looks like he borrowed someone's dreds and glued them on, ya know?)

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Moving right along, what is funnier than a fat old guy in a thong, standing at attention while watching the Blue Angels?  

Not much, I'm telling you:

One can't help but wonder if he's saluting... 

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AND... okay,  I was kind of responsible for this.  This is my son, Kacey.  The picture on the left was taken of him 10 years ago, with his patented "It's a good thing I'm pretty" look.  The picture on the right was a candid shot taken of him last weekend at the Raider's game, wearing his "It's a good thing I'm pretty" look.  I thought it was hilarious.  (This is the child who said to me one morning, "Did the lights flicker?"  Me:  "No... why?"  Him:  *pause*  "Never mind... I just blinked."  Isn't he beautiful?)

Huhhhh?

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This picture came from my friend, Dana, with the included caption, and it honestly made me snort with laughter:  (I can't STAND Paula Deen.  Don't get me wrong, as a chubby girl I do love me some butter.  But seriously... the way she says the word "butter" makes me feel creepy and like I need to take a shower.  I'm all, "Seriously, Paula... just take the butter and turn off the camera.  Jesus."  I'm always a little embarrassed for the butter.)

I didn't know Paula Deen came out with a breath spray...

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The following was on a friend's Facebook page (I'm not mentioning her name because I'm not sure if she would appreciate it if I shared with the world that she's a dirty, dirty girl.  But she is.  I'm just not sure if she wants it advertised.  Even though she is.)  

Her:  "Anyone have a crop I can borrow for my costume?"

The response from one of her friends:

" at first i thought you meant like a "crop of corn" or some other veggie...now I know you mean like riding crop, and frankly that scares me just a little bit! :)"

I found this just for you, dollface:

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And finally, this was from one of my dear friends, who actually would be perfect for my husband (and I just might give him to her for Chritmas... SURPRISE!!!):

Friend:  "OMG. I just got a message on OKCupid. From a guy dressed like Cookie Monster in his photo. Seriously??????"

Response from one of her friends: " I say give cookie the nookie."

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!!!