Because sometimes a status update just isn't enough.

Because sometimes a status update just isn't enough.

10 November 2011

Appearing now on Facebook: Karma

Let's discuss the pity party I've been throwing for myself lately, shall we?  
It's been LEGENDARY.  LEH.JEN.DAIR.EEEEE.  We're talking party hats, strippers, confetti, champagne... the works.  

It started out with the usual trials and tribulations of being unemployed and broke... I haven't bought anything new in like, ever.  I have to do my own nails.  I have to dye my own hair.  I have to cook dinner every freaking night because we can't afford to eat out.  

(That's right, bitches... FEEL SORRY FOR ME.)

Then all the fucking Christmas commercials started happening.  Thank you, Mass Consumerism, for reminding me that I can't afford to buy anyone a present this year.  (So if you don't want a handmade crocheted pot holder for Christmas, let me know now.)

(Sidebar:  Is it just me or does it sound like they're saying "Walking in an Orgy Wonderland" all throughout this commercial?  Because I'm telling you, I hear "orgy."  Over and over and over again.)

In no particular order, other things that are sucking hard in my life currently would be:

My dad is terminally ill with stomach cancer and basically, will die fairly soon.

I'm 3000 miles away and can't go say good-bye.

I'm not sure I WANT to go say good-bye.

I'm a horrible person because I don't want to say good-bye.

My son is being deployed to the middle east... again.

Did I mention I'm unemployed, still, going on 7 months?

I really, REALLY hate having no money.

Just because they're removing soldiers from Iraq doesn't mean they aren't relocating them to Afghanistan, and of course, that means MY kid volunteered to go.

Because he's that kind of hero.

And also?  I kind of want to shoot him in the foot myself so that he doesn't have to go.

Oh... and finally?


(Shocking, right?  I'll give you all a moment to process this.)

Nobody likes me.  Everybody hates me.

That's right, people... Worms were on the menu.

"We've got a friendless fat girl in Northern New York... East bound and down, loaded up and truckin..."

I was pretty sad, people.  There I was, posting and posting and posting... not a single "Like"... No "LOL"... not even a freaking smiley face emoticon.

You all SUCK.

Today, I was talking to my friend Joan and she said, "You need to get back to blogging, maybe that'll help pull you out of this..."

Me:  "I haven't stopped blogging..."

Her:  "You haven't posted any blogs on Facebook since the end of October."

Me:  "I've been blogging like every day..."

Anyhoo, one thing led to another and as it turns out, I've been posting everything on Facebook to ONLY MYSELF.

Who can see this?


Who saw the beautiful picture of my son and daughter in law at the Marine Corps ball?


Here it is, since you all missed it... Kacey and Danielle at the Marine Corps ball.

Who has been seeing my blog postings?



Really, Karma?  REALLY?  You're messing with me on FACEBOOK now?

So anyway, long story short, the party's over.

And this?

Is my theme song.

That's right, motherfuckers... I'm AWESOME.


  1. I had thought you might have defriended me...srsly. But because I've had my head up my ass regarding my job drama, I didn't "have time" to see what was kudos to Joan for figuring it out :/

  2. Well, at least we in the good ole blogosphere still (heart) you.

    I am so sorry about your dad. I understand the urge not to go. You are not a horrible person, just a normal one. Stay strong, girlie!

    Also . . . that is a beautiful picture of your son & DIL.

  3. You are are wonderful, beautiful person [in every way]. You bring laughter and great joy to a lot of people ... glad to have you "back-on-track" ... sorry that life's [current] challeges are creating [additional] stress. Chin up ... moving forward ... smile [whenever possible] ... keep the world guessing!!

  4. Your pity party sounds justified, but I'm glad you've come through the other side. You are motherfucking awesome!

    Also, I'm sorry about your Dad, I think you should shot your son in the foot and Facebook is an asshole.

  5. Facebook is lame all around lately. I don't even go there to post my blog link, I just do it from my website directly. That said, I would probably have noticed if you weren't posting anything, being that I stalk you on the daily anyway.

    Also, I am very sorry for what you're going through with your dad. Cancer is horrific and survivors and our families spend years waiting with bated breath for every clean scan. The way it affects everyone even remotely connected to it so deeply is incredibly unfair, and I wish there were some profound thing I could say to make it better.

    My wholly inadequate advice is to celebrate his life now and always so that he is always alive and well in your memory, and come find me if you want to blubber nonsensically to someone who understands and won't judge.

  6. That is heavy. I don't consider your feelings to be a pity party - things are rough, and it's difficult to make sense of all those issues happening at one time, to one person.

    I'm sorry to hear about your dad. Cancer is terrible. Unfortunately, it's hard to come up with any words to make it all better, or any better, really. For what it's worth, my thoughts are with you.

    And as for your son, I can't imagine how hard it is to see him go overseas AGAIN. But wow, you clearly are a wonderful mother, and your son is a hero.

  7. {{{Dani}}} I was starting to worry . . .

    Those are beautiful pix of the kids. A big thank you to Kacey and Brennan for their service . . . they'll be in my thoughts tomorrow.

    I suspect we have similar conflicting emotions about our dads, and I understand.

    Big hugs, and mucho, mucho job mojo! <3

  8. I've always thought you were awesome, you are absolutely my favorite blogger, and I'll provide drinks for the next pity party if you want me to.

    Honey, I'm so sorry about your dad. I hope you can find some peace and comfort with the situation, regardless of what you decide to do.

    I'm with Lil Tirade on this one, shoot your son in the foot, look horrified and swear it was an accident. (Your son is gorgeous, by the way, as is his wife)

    And Facebook is a bitch.

  9. Oh hai.
    I just stumbled here and have fallen in love with you.
    Facebook is totally a bitch like that, hiding awesome shit,
    but Facebook is also a dirty whore in the way it allows your mortal enemies to still see and comment on your shit, or, call your mother and tattle on you. Or that could just be my own brand of Facebook Karma.

    either way,

    you're awesome. and I'm hereby adding you to my 'stalk daily' list.
    I promise I'm mostly harmless. :D

  10. You ROCK. I heart you. That is all...:)

  11. Sending some good vibes your way!!! I hope things get better soon, I hate when life kicks you in the vag...

  12. All this lovin' made me feel soooo warm and fuzzy! Thank you all for the kind thoughts and words.

    And seriously, reading all your blogs is the high point of most of my days... There isn't a time that I read them and *don't* laugh.


  13. I love you. You know this.
    Thank you for the sacrifices you make with letting your beloved boys go and fight for our freedom. I could not even begin to imagine.

    And for your pa, my heart goes out to you. Again I couldn't imagine. So I'd say your party is justifiable. But I love that you are trying hard not to let it dampen your spirits.

    And? I thought I was the only one that thought it said "Orgy Wonderland".



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