Actual thought that just this second burst into my head and caused momentary panic: "Oh shit! It's after 10:00! I'M MISSING MAURY!!!"
I know, right? I know.
THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE HAS BECOME.
I really, REALLY need a job.
Or a hobby.
Or a cheeseburger...
In my defense, how is this not fascinating? Isn't there a part of you that watches in disbelief and joy as people parade their skid-marked undies out onto the stage and share that shit stain with the world?
No?
Just me, then?
Fine.
But aren't you just a littttttle bit curious?
Really?
Not even a little??
